Tempest7: Blogger

When To Accept a Gift?

It has been busy, since I am just spending time in the office helping people out. I'm not getting paid but the benefit is basically that I am busy and it forces me to get up and out each day. I don't allow myself time to get rusty. I know some people when they stop working they become really lazy and inactive. These actions are perpetual, if they start they snowball, so it is better to be busy then to get lazy. I've been working with a Fortinet Fortigate 100A security appliance. It is one of those intergrated solutions, console/web admin interface, with built in AV and IPS (basically an IDS, but can respond to triggers). My "co-workers" have been driving me crazy. I don't mind spending time helping them design a network setup and setting up the firewall system, but I get pulled away to help fix English for proposals and applications as well. They had problems with thier SMTP server this morning, basically not understanding the configuration, and were asking me about it as well. Some things you can do at the same time but editing a form in English, troubleshooting a mail server relay problem, and configuring a firewall are not things that can be finished concurrently. I am investing a lot of time into the company but I don't have the pay to show for it. A few people are planning on leaving the company at the moment as well.

Today was a good day for taking pictures. Kristie, the design instructor, had ever so nicely agreed to help me take pictures. They turned out well, but not good enough. I have a lot of work to do infront of a camera to build up a portfolio. A lot of the problem lies with myself. Connie mentioned how it just seems unnatural for most guys infront of a camera. Posing I can get use to, but learning to smile will take some time.

The main topic though is what to do about accepting gifts. I'm sure this happens to quite a few girls, so their opinions are probably what I need the most. If someone of the opposite sex gives you a nice (or some-what expensive) gift and you are friends with them but only have known them for a short period of time, do you accept? Lets be more specific. If the gift is not something that can be returned, has been bought specifically for you, say hypothetically speaking a silver necklace, from a friend who lives on their own and works at a low paying job... should you accept? I say girls might have an easier time with this situtations because sometimes it doesn't have to be a friend who does not know them well, but it could be a man who is interested in them. Often times a male will end up buying gifts to try to attract the female. This seems to be a view strengthened by media and commercial companies. The gift can not be return, so I suppose it is something I should accept, but in light of the fact that I am so concerned with my own living budget, I can accept the fact that I am taking resources away from someone else's hard life. Do you buy a gift in return? Even if I am watching my own budget? I'm already debating about money I shouldn't spend, and staying at home when I am invited to go out. I turned down one karaoke but since Priscilla's birthday is coming out then I will probably go to that one. I'm not sure why I feel guilty, I just wonder how other people deal with this situtation.

Edit (13/11/2005): A friend mentioned something else of interest. If a man gives a girl a gift, the girl will feel obligated to decline if they have no intention. The man should be able to take the rejection. But for a girl, if you accept then you are showing intention, if you reject then it is insulting and damaging. Is this right?

posted by Tempest7 @ 01:06